| |
When
Smart Isn't
The
24 October 2006 edition of the Zeitgeist Z-News
From Smart
Growth to Smart Cards, everybody seems to be jumping on the “smart”
bandwagon. Except...how smart is it when your process or product isn’t?
Over the past couple weeks, I’ve been faced with three examples
of self-proclaimed smartness that were anything but:
Smart Meetings. When my subscription to Smart
Meetings magazine expired, a telemarketer called to
assist me in the renewal process. After what seemed like 15-minutes
of walking me through a myriad of fields in her computer record, she
asked for my home address. I declined to provide that nugget of information
as I don’t want the magazine showing up at my home. She responded
that it was required. I countered that she wasn’t going to get
it.
She paused to consider this dilemma...and then moved on to other fields
on her screen, which included the city of my birth.
OK. Enough. This is a renewal to a magazine, not a credit card. I understand
that Smart Meetings has some need to prove its subscriber base
to the auditors so it can charge what it charges to skeptical advertisers.
But, that’s not my problem.
And, after playing 20 questions over a magazine, I told the telemarketer
that she had just made it too difficult for me to continue subscribing...and
hung up.
Smart Meetings. Dumb Business Practice.
Holiday Inn Express. As the Holiday
Inn franchise continues to flounder in brand purgatory,
its Express
extension continues to impress with amenities that approach those of
upscale hotels. Better bedding. Expanded breakfast offerings. And elegantly
designed bathroom features.
Actually...a little too elegant. As often happens when the creative
types gain control of the product, the complimentary soap, shampoo and
lotion containers are maddeningly confusing. Now, maybe this is because
I’m a guy...but, as I stand in front of the mirror at 6:15am and
look at the cool tubes of assorted gels and goo, I struggle with which
ones to use. Instead of Soap and Shampoo, I’m
faced with Scrub and Wash. Next to them are Smooth
and Tame.
I’m sorry...it’s too early in the morning to play “What’s
My Line.” While the containers are cool, this line of "smart"
toiletries is anything but.
Great Lakes Airlines. On my way to the Kansas
Travel Industry Association Conference this month, I presented
myself at the Denver
gate to board Great
Lakes' puddle-jumper to Dodge
City.
“I need to see your paper ticket,” said the gate agent.
“Don’t have one,” I replied.
She then proceeded to tell me that, unless I gave her a paper ticket,
her airline wouldn’t get paid. Despite the fact that my name was
on her computer screen and that I had a confirmed seat (which presumably
was linked to my credit card information), she told me that I would
have to buy a paper ticket to get on the plane.
Now, maybe I just haven’t been flying to all the right places...but
I haven’t seen a paper ticket in five years. When I informed her
of this she simply smiled and said, “Oh yes, this happens all
the time. Everyday, in fact.”
If it happens every day, then I have to surmise that the management
at Great Lakes is either really stupid...or they are doing this on purpose
to take advantage of the monetary float they get with the double-paid
tickets until the first ticket price is refunded.
I’m really hoping that they’re just stupid...because the
alternative is just wrong.
The moral of these stories: Regardless of what you think you need or
what you think is cool, always design your products and processes with
the customer in mind. Or the customer will find another alternative.
Bill
|
|
